True love never runs smooth
by miss lin
Summary: This is my first attempt at a fan fic story.It revolves around the characters of Christian, Syed and Amira. Each chapter is told from the viewpoint of a different character.Further chapters to follow if you enjoy my story.please review.
1. Chapter 1

True love never runs smooth - A story about Christian, Syed and Amira from Eastenders

Chapter 1 -(told from Christians point of view)

The shrill ringing of the alarm clock woke Christian from a deep sleep. He reached out and thumped the button to end the noise that seemed to be piercing his skull like a pnuematic drill. He turned over and lay on his back staring at the ceiling with dark, unseeing eyes. He couldn't beleive that he had got through another night without him, and now he had to face the day without him too. At least in the dark depths of the night he could escape into his dreams, if only for a few hours, in the daylight he had no such luxury, he seemed to always be there,lurking in his mind, he couldn't escape from the constant memories. It was absolute and utter torture.

Everywhere he went and everything he did reminded him of the happy times he and Syed had shared together. If he went to the cafe all he could see was Syed sitting in the corner dazzling him with one of his heartbreaking smiles as he walked in. If he went to the Vic that was hell too because all he could think about was that time at Denise's wedding when he'd held Syed's hand and told him he loved him. Yes, He'd been a little bit drunk but he'd meant every word and was thrilled when Syed hadn't pushed him away, frightened that someone would see like he usually did. Instead he'd gazed at Christian, his big brown eyes shining and Christian saw in them his answer,that Syed loved him too.

He'd even had to quit his job at Masala Queen because he couldn't bear to be in the place where it had all started a year ago. He smiled in spite of himself as he recalled how a bitter argument between himself and Syed had ended in the most passionate, unexpected, exciting way he'd ever known. He'd not guessed the real reason for Syed's anger towards him and even now he shook his head in bewilderment that he hadn't seen the signs before that moment. Who would have thought that the gorgeous man with the beautiful, perfect girlfriend, preferred him!

The smile however vanished as quickly as it had appeared when he thought of Amira, he knew it wasn't her fault but he couldn't help resenting the fact that he and Syed would be together now if it wasn't that Syed had been too decent to hurt her and tell her the truth straight away. Now it was too late and he had been well and truly pushed into a corner by Zainab demanding that Syed marry Amira otherwise eternal shame would be brought on their family and he would lose them all forever. He had hated Zainab for that, for making the only man he had ever truly loved totally and utterly miserable.

The insistent buzzing of his mobile phone snapped him out of his day dream and he snatched it up crossly. Glancing at the display he realised he didn't recognise the number. He almost dropped the phone in shock when he heard the voice on the other end ...


	2. True love never runs smooth chapter 2

True love never runs smooth 

Chapter 2 -(told from Amira's point of view)

Amira's hand was shaking as she dialled the number, the number she was hoping she would never have to use again. It had to be done, he had to know the truth. She couldn't face phoning Syed directly, it would only tear her apart to hear his voice again, the voice that once used to make her insides turn to jelly and her heart beat twice as fast as usual. He had betrayed her and humiliated her in the worst possible way and yet there was a tiny, miniscule part of her that longed to see him, hear him, touch him. Who was she kidding she thought, she still loved him despite everything and the thought of never seeing him again was ripping her heart into a thousand pieces. As Christian answererd the phone she sank into a chair and nervously rubbed her stomach, trying to gain comfort from the new life growing inside her.

When Christian eventually answered the phone her courage almost failed her, but she knew it had to be done and right at this moment Christian seemed to be the lesser of two evils. At first she could hardly get the words out she was stuttering so badly. But as she told Christian about needing to see Syed as he had a responsibility to his child, she felt some of the tension and unease leaving her. She knew it was wrong but she couldn't help feeling some small sense of gratification at the obvious distress she was causing him. Perhaps now he would feel some of what she had been feeling. She knew he was uneasy because of his ragged breathing and the sudden sharp intake of breath when she told him about the baby.

She and Syed shared something that he could never be a part of, she had given Syed something he never could,a baby, She finished making arrangements with Christian to meet Syed, he'd said he would break the news to him, it would be better coming from him. She'd almost laughed at that, the cheek of the man. who did he think he was? She hung the phone up while he was still talking, still trying to say sorry, as if that would make up for everything. She thought she would be physically sick if she had to listen to him anymore, so she just cut him off.

She leaned her head back against the chair and closed her eyes. Well that was phase one of her plan put into operation, She'd made contact. What would Syed do when Christian told him she wondered. What would he feel? Would he be upset, angry, confused? She was very apprehensive about seeing him again, but she supposed he would be easier to deal with than her father, how on earth was she going to get out of the house in the first place?...


	3. Chapter 3

True love never runs smooth – chapter 3 

Told from Syed's point of view

Syed sank to his knees in the bathroom and wept till he had no tears left. This situation was utterly impossible, it was tearing him apart and he felt like he was going mad. He loved his family, of course he did but he loved Christian too and he couldn't understand why he couldn't have both, why was he being punished just for falling in love?

After the revelation at the party about him and Christian things had gone from bad to worse. Amira had been distraught, devastated, and he couldn't forgive himself for inflicting so much pain and heartache on her, she hadn't deserved it. He could't believe that Christian had forced him to come clean so dramatically, but then again he supposed he had no choice, Syed hadn't left him any choice.

And now he had lost everything, Amira, Christian, his parents. Zainab could barely bring herself to look at him and he was only allowed to stay in the house because Masood had insisted upon it to her. Tamwar was his one and only consolation, the only one who had shown him any empathy or understanding, the only one who had ever asked him how he was feeling. All Zainab and Masood were concerned about was how this whole business had affected them, how it made them look to other people. They thought he could just wipe Christian from his memory and pretend that it had never happened. Zainab was even talking about inviting the Aunties over to find him "a nice girl". The woman was incredible, she had buried her head in the sand like an ostrich and was determined to stay there!

Syed sighed and pushed his hair out of his eyes. He must stop wallowing in self-pity he told himself. But it was difficult when he kept bumping into Christian everytime he left the house. Only that morning he had almost collided with Christian as he was coming out of the shop. Syed had been deep in thought and hadn't seen him until Christian had snapped at him to "watch where you're going!" and had then stormed out of the shop. It had been almost like a physical pain seeing him, Hearing his voice and not being able to touch him. He had wanted to run after him, throw himself at his feet and beg him for forgiveness, but he knew it was too late for that. The look on Christians face had said it all, he would never forgive him for everything he had done, all the lies and sneaking around had taken their toll and there was no hope left.

Nothing mattered anymore, all he had to do now was try and get through each day by immersing himself in work, work and more work. The intrusive ringing of his mobile cut into his reverie and he glanced at the screen in amazement, it was Christian! What could he want? He was excited and nervous all at the same time, but he couldn't ignore it. He picked up the phone and listened incredulously as Christian began to speak….


	4. Chapter 4

True love never runs smooth – chapter 4

Told from Christians point of view

Christian knew he couldn't put the dreaded moment off any longer, he had to phone Syed and tell him about Amira and the baby. How would he take it?. When he had seen him at the shop earlier he had looked dreadful. His beautiful eyes were sunken in and red-rimmed from lack of sleep and crying. He looked like he hadn't shaved in days and his gorgeous black, silky hair had looked dishevelled and unkempt. Christians heart had leapt at the sight of him and all he'd wanted to do was wrap his arms around him and never let him go again. He'd snapped at Syed in his confusion at seeing him in such a poor state and the hurt he'd seen in those big brown eyes had almost been his undoing.

He mentally shook himself and scrolled through the list of names until he found the one he needed, the one name in the world that meant so much and had at the same time caused such pain to his soul.

When Syed answered the sound of his voice took his breath away, he was stunned into silence for a brief moment, and he got such a big lump in his throat he could hardly swallow. He heard the sharp intake of breath as he told Syed about Amira, and felt distress that he had been the one to add to his troubles. Syed was stuttering, mumbling something about how it couldn't possibly be true, but then reality must have hit home because with his next breath he was asking Christian when and where Amira wanted to see him.

When hed told him the details Christian hung up and sat with his head in his hands pondering on what had just happened. What if Syed saw Amira and realised he wanted to make another go of it?. It would destroy Christian totally if that were to happen. Syed was such a decent person with a sensitive heart. He knew he was bitterly regretting all the trauma he had caused and would want to do the right thing by Amira. Syed was always trying to do the right thing by everybody at the expense of his own well-being and happiness. Christian just hoped that Amira wouldn't be able to wrap Syed around her little finger,the way that she had so effectively in the past….


	5. Chapter 5

True love never runs smooth – Chapter 5

Told from Amira's point of view

Amira smiled at her Dad as she lied through her teeth. She'd told him she was going shopping for baby things and he'd willingly shoved a wad of "twenties" in her hands and told her to enjoy herself. She couldn't believe how easy it had been to convince him to let her go out alone but then again he had business problems to sort out. One of his associates was late paying back a loan and Qadim didn't like to be made a fool of!

She slipped away as soon as he left, her mind was whirling as she stepped onto the bus, after all these months she was finally going to see him again. Her stomach was churning and she hoped it was just nerves and not the baby making its presence felt! .

She leant her fast against the cool glass of the bus window and went over in her mind exactly what she was going to say when she saw Syed again. She knew that somehow she had to persuade him to try again. She couldn't bear to go through another day without him. Every morning when she opened her eyes and she realised he wasn't beside her was gut-wrenching agony. She knew she couldn't take much more. She was going to get him back, whatever it took.

She didn't care what had gone on in the past, all that stuff with Christian. Syed was confused and Christian had taken advantage of that confusion, she knew that now. None of it was Syed's doing, she had convinced herself of would learn to be a better wife, cook and lover. She knew that Syed loved her deep down, she just had to find a way of unlocking that love.

She also had to formulate some kind of plan to drive Christian completely out of his mind and his life. Just quite how she was going to achieve this, she didn't yet know. She had an inkling that Christian wasn't going to be that easy to get rid had shown his true feelings towards Syed at the party when he'd declared his love in front of everyone. She knew Christian well, he didn't usually do "the love thing", he was more of a "love 'em and leave 'em" type. So Amira knew that his feelings for Syed must run pretty deep.

Amira opened her eyes and saw that she was nearly at her destination. In just a few minutes she would be seeing him again! She took a small mirror from her bag and checked her appearance. "Perfect" she thought smugly to herself," Syed is not going to know what's hit him!." Then she glanced out of the window and saw him waiting, nervously shuffling his feet. She got up and walked towards the front of the bus. Phase two of her plan was about to begin…


	6. Chapter 6

True love never runs smooth- Chapter 6

Told from Syed's point of view

Syed was still in a state of shock after the phone call from Christian a few hours before. He had listened incredulously as Christian had outlined the details of the phone call from Amira. He couldn't begin to describe the intensity of the emotions that had coursed through his body at the sound of Christians voice. Longing, happiness, sadness, regret, he had felt them all and more during the ten minute phone call. He wondered if Christian felt the same. Did he wake up in the middle of the night too and reach out to touch him, only to find no-one there? Did he cry himself to sleep feeling utter despair and a crushing loneliness that threatened to engulf his very being?

He was jerked roughly out of his musings by the sound of a bus rounding the corner. In just a moment he would be face to face with Amira, the woman whose life he had ruined with his lies and deceit. How was he going to look her in the eyes knowing the devastation he was certain he would find in their depths. He knew with solemn certainty that "sorry" simply wasn't going to cut it.

Amira was such a sweet, gentle girl. A little spoilt perhaps and sometimes she could be selfish and just a bit pushy, but basically she was a decent girl whose heart was in the right place. She hadn't deserved any of what he and Christian had dished out to her. She'd done nothing to deserve it, and now she was carrying his child. A child who one day would grow up and want to know why his Dad had left his Mum. What would he say to him/her?. He was frightened that telling the truth would make his child hate him, but not telling the truth would make his child despise him for being a coward and a liar.

Suddenly he saw Amira standing up to get off the bus and he thought he was going to faint or be sick. His mind was telling him to be strong, stand up and take whatever she threw at him, but at the same time a little voice in his head also was telling him to run away and don't look back. However he took a deep breath, squared his shoulders and prepared to face the woman who had once been his wife, the woman who once he thought he could build a future with, have a family with.

Then she was right there in front of him, saying his name and looking at him with her head on one side. Syed stared back at her, she was so very beautiful. Then he did something he never in his wildest dreams thought he would ever do again, he reached out and grabbed her hand…


	7. Chapter 7

True love never runs smooth – chapter 7

Told from Christian's point of view

Christian stood at the window gazing out across the square. People were going about their everyday business like they didn't have a care in the world, and most of them probably didn't he thought wryly.

He turned away from the scenes of normality being played out below him and flopped wearily down onto the sofa. When was this torment going to end? He didn't think he could take much more. Despite all the pain and hurt of the last few months, he wouldn't change meeting Syed for the world. Ever since their first kiss he had been lost, lost in his love for this stunning troubled man who had come to mean so much to him.

Christian hoped and prayed that Amira wasn't giving him too much grief, but then again knowing her she probably was, Christian had come to the conclusion that if Syed decided to try again with Amira, then he would have to leave Walford for good. It would be too painful to stick around and see them everyday, see them happy, but most of all to see Amira's smug face and round belly, full of the baby that Syed, his Syed had given her.

He sighed deeply and ran his hands through his hair. "Enough of this" he told himself crossly. Sitting around feeling sorry for himself wasn't going to solve anything. Then suddenly like a bolt from the blue it came to him. Why should he let her win?. He'd never been a quitter and he wasn't about to start now! He would fight for his man. He smiled wryly to himself, he knew it sounded corny but it was true. He hadn't been to hell and back over the last few months to give up on Syed now. Everything they'd been through had to count for something.

He knew that Syed loved him, really loved him. What he felt for Amira was pity, guilt and the kind of love that you'd have for a sister or a friend. Christian knew that it wasn't the passion fuelled, all consuming love that Syed felt for him. He couldn't bear to think of going through the rest of his life without Syed. He knew there were a lot of obstacles in his way, Amira, the baby, Masood and Zainab, but what Christian Clark wanted, Christian Clark got! He stood up with determination written all over his face, he was more than ready for anything they could throw at him….


End file.
